NERVOUS ABOUT THERAPY? YOU’RE NOT ALONE, ESPECIALLY AFTER A BIG MOVE OR DEPLOYMENT

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Military life brings constant change. New duty stations, frequent relocations, and deployment uncertainty create real challenges. Combined, these changes often make military spouses want support but feel nervous about therapy.
Hesitation to seek help is an experience many military spouses are familiar with. Imagine facing the weight of multiple relocations, the stress of deployments, and the juggling act of daily life—all without the usual support systems surrounding you. It's not surprising that getting emotional support feels like yet another hurdle.
That hesitation is common. Studies show that military families are more likely to face stress, depression, and anxiety but less likely to seek counseling than their civilian peers, according to the National Institutes of Health. Reasons include stigma, trouble finding a trusted provider, and fear of being judged.
“Military life is stressful, and spouses often put their own needs last. Therapy can feel intimidating—but it’s one of the strongest choices you can make,” explains VA psychologist and mental health advocate Dr. Paul Robrecht.
The Emotional Weight of Relocation
Unless you’ve stopped your life and started all over, in a new place, with new people, and often no one that you know, it’s very difficult to understand what that actually feels like. Unless you’re a military spouse, it’s unlikely you can relate to the stressors of repeating this transition over and over again.
Every permanent change of station (PCS) means starting over from scratch. New schools, new doctors, new friends, and sometimes no family nearby. That isolation is a big reason many military spouses feel overwhelmed, especially in the first six months after a move.
Deployment adds another layer. Solo parenting, financial strain, and constant worry about a partner’s safety can leave spouses feeling overwhelmed. Maybe it’s like Taylor Swift says, and it’s just a “thunderstorm in a teacup.” But even in the tiniest storm, we can become adrift.
During times like these, therapy can offer a safe and confidential space for milspouses to process their emotions.
Common stress points for military spouses after a move or deployment include:
- Sudden loss of a support system
- Challenges in finding new childcare or healthcare
- Increased household and parenting responsibilities
- Feelings of isolation or loneliness
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Why Feeling Nervous About Therapy Is Normal
The biggest challenge for many is simply taking the first step toward therapy. Asking for help may seem daunting due to the widespread myth of self-reliance, especially in military life. But real courage lies in seeking support and breaking that myth. Early mental health care helps reduce stress and build resilience.
If you feel unsure about therapy, remember that others, especially after significant life changes, have likely felt the same way. Therapy is simply another form of support, like leaning on a friend or joining a spouse group, but guided by a professional.
Making Therapy Accessible for Military Spouses
One of the biggest hurdles is access. Rural duty stations, long waitlists on base, and childcare challenges can make traditional in-person therapy difficult. Many spouses opt for flexible options, such as online therapy, to access the help they need.
Platforms like Talkspace have become popular with military families because they remove barriers. Sessions can be conducted from home, schedules are flexible, and finding the right therapist is quick and easy. For spouses juggling deployments, childcare, and careers, this convenience can make it much easier to get help.
Want practical ways to support your military family through deployment? Start with these proven tips for navigating change and stress.
How to Start Therapy, Even If You’re Unsure
If you’re feeling nervous about therapy, try starting small:
- Write it out first. Journaling your worries can make them easier to share.
- Ask about confidentiality. Knowing your sessions are private helps ease concerns.
- Start with just one session. You don’t have to commit for the long term. Many spouses are surprised by how much better they feel after the first conversation.
- Explore virtual care. Online therapy can be less intimidating than walking into a clinic.
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A Shared Experience, a Shared Strength
Military spouses are known for their strength, but strength doesn’t mean going it alone. Every PCS, every deployment, and every homecoming brings a wave of emotions that deserve space and support.
If therapy feels intimidating, know that many military spouses hesitate at first. Those who try it often discover it’s a valuable step for themselves and their families. Imagine the collective strength of those who have walked this path before you, building a network of courage. As you consider your journey, think of the community that supports you, offering encouragement.
Support looks different for everyone. For some, it’s a close friend. For others, it’s a professional counselor, either in person or through accessible platforms, like Talkspace. The most important thing is to reach for support when you need it.
The military journey is unique, but no military spouse has to navigate it alone.
This article is a result of a paid partnership with Talkspace.
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Veteran & Senior Contributor, Military News
BY NATALIE OLIVERIO
Navy Veteran
Natalie Oliverio is a Navy Veteran, journalist, and entrepreneur whose reporting brings clarity, compassion, and credibility to stories that matter most to military families. With more than 100 published articles, she has become a trusted voice on defense policy, family life, and issues shaping the ...
Credentials
- Navy Veteran
- 100+ published articles
- Veterati Mentor
- Travis Manion Foundation Mentor
- Journalist and entrepreneur
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