CARING FOR YOURSELF WHILE CARING FOR OTHERS: 8 SELF-CARE STRATEGIES FOR MILSPOUSES
Being a military spouse always comes with a sacrifice, because you juggle the weight of everyday life while your partner serves. Most of the time, you have a lot of responsibilities alone as you are holding together the household, caring for children, managing finances, and providing emotional support for both your children and spouse. We know that that kind of emotional labor doesn’t come without a cost.
It’s easy to push your own needs aside, telling yourself you’ll rest later. But caring for yourself is essential because when you’re well, your whole family benefits. Below are 8 self-care strategies that can help you show up for yourself just as much as you show up for everyone else.
Prioritizing Your Emotional Well-Being
1. It’s Okay to Feel Your Emotions
Military life always comes with emotions, and a lot of times, it’s all different. Loneliness, worry, frustration, pride, and everything in between. And it’s okay to feel all of it.
Most of the time, military spouses feel pressure to hold it together while their partner is away, but bottling it up only makes their feelings heavier.
Connecting with licensed professionals, whether that be through a one-time check-in or through ongoing support, allows you to give yourself the space to process emotions, making it one of the most healing steps you can take.
2. Set Healthy Boundaries (And Stick to Them)
When you're constantly giving to kids, extended family, and friends, it can be really easy to burn out. So, setting boundaries is important, and it doesn’t mean shutting people out because you are only protecting your time, energy, and mental health.
Maybe it’s saying “no” to an extra event, turning off your phone for an hour a day, or asking your partner for 15 minutes of uninterrupted time to decompress when they’re home.
The small boundaries matter. They help you build the habit of valuing your own needs just as much as everyone else’s.
Creating Daily Routines
3. Have an Intention Each Day
Your day might be packed with responsibilities, and how you begin and end it can set the tone. You don’t need a full-blown morning ritual; it can be just a simple stretch before the kids wake up, journaling a line or two, or sipping your coffee in silence.
At night, a simple wind-down routine can help calm your nervous system and improve sleep. These intentions can create space for reflection and rest, even when the rest of the day feels chaotic.
4. Make Sure to Move Your Body
As a military spouse, you might forget to move your body as often as you’d like. We often think of working out as being a long, time-consuming session, but it doesn’t have to be.
A 10-minute walk, a dance break with your toddler, or a quick YouTube yoga video can be a way to move your body.
If motivation is a challenge, try reframing movement as something you get to do, not something you have to do. Just remember that one step at a time is still moving in the right direction.
Building Connection and Support Systems
5. Stay Connected to People Who Get It
Having at least one person you can talk to honestly, without needing to explain the whole backstory, can be a lot of help because you have someone who relates to you.
It can be either a fellow milspouse, a support group, or a therapist; the connection you have will reduce emotional weight.
Even online therapy can help as it offers the same level of professional care with the convenience of your schedule.
6. Stop Comparing Your Struggles to Others
Just because someone else seems to be handling it all doesn’t mean your experience is any less valid because everyone has a different capacity. Social media can make it seem like others are thriving while you’re barely holding on, and comparison steals your peace.
Instead of asking, “Why can’t I do what she’s doing?” ask, “What do I need right now?” Sometimes, it leads to reaching out for help, which is one of the strongest things you can do.
Making Mental Health Care More Accessible
7. Seek Professional Support Before You Hit a Wall
Even when you have some self-care strategies, there will come a time when you will reach your breaking point. So, the best time to seek support is before then.
Many spouses don’t realize it until they’re overwhelmed or exhausted before they consider therapy.
TRICARE offers help without referrals, and appointments are often available much faster than traditional clinics. So, if you feel like you’re almost reaching that point, you have to check in with your mental health.
With TRICARE, there’s a wide range of mental health services that you can avail yourself of, such as telehealth, including therapy for anxiety, depression, relationship challenges, and more, which can help you if you are struggling with any of these.
8. Make Sure to Celebrate Your Small Wins
It’s important to celebrate the little victories because these moments matter. Tracking small wins can rebuild your confidence and reduce the feeling that you’re not doing enough.
Celebrate your small wins by writing them down in a notebook or even sharing them with a fellow military spouse. Progress is still progress, no matter how small, so make sure to celebrate it as well.
Give Yourself the Same Care You Would Give Others With Talkspace
When you hear about self-care, you might think it’s just bubble baths and quiet time, and yes, those kinds of self-care strategies can help, but you also have to treat yourself with the same kindness, patience, and compassion that you so freely give to others. Recognizing your limits and making your well-being a priority can help you become a better version of yourself.
With tools like Talkspace, which is now covered by TRICARE, you don’t have to navigate your struggles all alone. Whether you need someone to talk to, help manage anxiety, or just want to feel more grounded, therapy is more accessible than ever.
Talkspace connects military families through an easy-to-use online platform with trusted, licensed mental health professionals, self-guided mental health resources, unlimited messaging, and much more.
Talkspace is now available through TRICARE. TRICARE offers help without referrals, and appointments are often available much faster than traditional clinics. Additionally, they offer great support, resources, and help for eligible service members, their spouses, and dependents aged 13 and older. With Talkspace, online therapy is much easier to take part in, and there are no long wait times, unlike in a physical setting.
So, if you’re thinking about getting help, Talkspace is your way to go. Self-care strategies are one way in which you can care for yourself, but getting help makes a big difference, and TRICARE makes it easier.
You carry so much. Let Talkspace carry some of it with you. Sign up today, and receive the care you deserve.
This editorial is a result of a paid collaboration with Talkspace.
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